Full Pelican
A degenerate cast talks about current events make fun of each other and makes light of things most people take seriously. Filthy humor, crap inventions, and sheer stupidity, it's not for the faint of heart or kids.
We are releasing episodes from the season 1 collection. These were recorded from 2021 to 2022 and never previously released. We will release two episodes of season 1 with every season 2 release until they have all been released.
Full Pelican
S2 E5 Bobbo Part 2 - The After Show?
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Introducing the Full Pelican Crew
Chadit's time for full pelican prepare yourself for some fucking creepiness . What time is it ? I said it was full pelican time . Bitch , welcome back to full pelican .
MaxWe got bobo max that bitch and chad the best .
ChadMaximized brown sucks , so he ain't here . Howie's over there being howie , howie , so you can fuck off too I don't know , that was the fucking mistake . What happens ? You fucking acknowledge him once , and now he's like I'm gonna speak someone said my name .
BobboWhere's my ?
Chadcoffee fucker uh damn , you didn't ask me for one oh , I was talking to fucking howie that's just fucking sensitive back in the day she doesn't automatically thought you were talking to be the coffee bitch , oh , you still are Obviously because you still answer for it .
MaxClearly Where's my coffee oh .
ChadI'm sorry .
BobboAnything you need Miles . Why are you doing that ?
ChadBecause he's like brown and he wants to smell what it's like on the inside . It's my own breath .
BobboWhy do you want to smell your own breath ?
ChadNo , that looks like a dry fleshlight . That's a two finger . My own mic . Why do you want to smell your own breath ? No fucking thing . That looks like a dry fleshlight . That's a two finger .
MaxIf it doesn't come through the microphone . Did you really smell it ?
Chadthough .
BobboOh , my god Well .
MaxI didn't know . Double bagging the mic made it sound like butthole , and it does .
ChadYeah , who'd have thunk it's just clown nose .
MaxI'm not actually sniffing it , I'd be scared to sniff that .
ChadIt's awful .
BobboAlright .
MaxWelcome again to Full Belly .
ChadSince Bobbo was with us last , Bobbo went on an excursion .
BobboI did go on an excursion .
ChadOh yeah , that's right . Part two . We got part two from the return of the Bobbo Bobbo .
Bobbo's Justin Timberlake Concert Adventure
BobboAnd I've been to Austin , texas , to see Justin Timberlake since then .
ChadWow .
BobboAnd it was fucking amazing .
ChadWith Austin , or the show or the butt sex ? Definitely not Austin .
MaxWell definitely not the show yeah .
BobboOh nevermind .
MaxAll that's left is the butt sex . I can't say that I'm yeah .
ChadCan't say what I got really lost , but it doesn't take much . I'm dumb .
BobboAnyway , the show was amazing . That sounds like a no , it really , really really was .
ChadDid you go for a ride with him after the fact ?
BobboNo , but fun fact they have these in Austin . They have the , just like in New Orleansleans the bike people , the bike people that carry you on the little pedicab thank you um , okay , cities tend to have these , yes , okay .
ChadSo yes , there's a pedicab , all right okay . Well , I don't go to cities often I'm a fucking country bumpkin , so anyway with an emphasis on the um where the fuck was I going with that okay ?
Bobboso justin timberlake posted a reel on instagram after the show . That was , he was in the back of a car , which we'll get to that . He was in the back of the car riding and he saw one of the pedicabs like bringing fans back to wherever the hell they parked and like she saw him and I'm like that could have been me , but my husband didn't want to take the pedicab , he wanted to fucking make me walk what my point is , that could have been me that got to see him in the car , except my husband made me walk instead of taking the pedicab .
ChadOh , so you got denied .
BobboYes .
ChadBut what if I ?
Bobbotook a pedicab and got to see Justin , life would have been made . I could have died a happy woman after that .
ChadI equate that to like a dog chasing a car , because what are you going ?
Bobboto do she like , jumped out of her seat and ran to the car right see , now that's .
ChadThat's depressing to me oh , I'd have done more than that well , yeah , you , you'd be , fucking , yeah , you'd be , yeah , yeah , yeah , give me a child basically get , get in there , Justin . Jessica ain't got shit on this Problem is the butt .
MaxSex prevents that .
ChadWell , the butt sex hadn't happened at this stage , that transaction hadn't been fully processed . No , I mean , or maybe it had .
BobboI don't know .
ChadNot from Justin . She wanted Justin in . There is the point . She would have jumped on there and like a remora yeah , yeah , on the top of the car so you , so you go to austin and you had to walk like some kind of fucking peasant , yes , down six street or some shit I don't know where , wherever was there a lot of people well , of course , because the concert just let out dangle , fuck I .
BobboI wasn't really there that long , but there were some cool things that happened , other than the concert , which , once again , concert was amazing . No , we didn't do butt sex in austin . What ?
MaxI feel like that's a breach contract . It's time to do that right , my sister and my daughter were both in the condo with us sounds like they're muffs .
ChadThey need a different room .
BobboWell , we didn't have the different money for that .
MaxShe didn't give up enough butt sex to be able to fill that cost . She spent all the butt sex money on the tickets All the butt sex money on the tickets .
ChadYeah Worth it . Gotta pay them scalpers bro .
BobboWorth it , okay . So wait , let me tell you about what happened at the concert . What happened at the concert ? Um rude , somebody fell asleep . Our seats were pretty fucking good . They were . They were decent , and then you know how it is at a concert where you can like , where there's . What am I trying ? To say we don't well they're , they're like stadium seats , obviously , and then if you walk all the way down , you're closer , obviously . Once again , obviously .
MaxThey call it the floor .
BobboNo , no , no , Bobbo , it wasn't quite the good job .
ChadThey called it the floor Bobbo . That's why you need a beer . Fucking chode . That's not going to fix that .
BobboNo , that's going to make that worse . No , it'll fix it . Well then you .
MaxSo you're saying you can't function unless you're out being an alcoholic ?
BobboNo , I'm in the middle of a story We'll discuss that later . Yeah , I'm sure it'll come up Anyway . So for his concert there's a stage A and a stage B and he walks from stage A to stage B about halfway through the show and does the rest of his show closer to moi . So when he did that , my little sister's fucking crazy love her she's your little sister she was like we're running down there .
BobboOh no , and I was like we're doing what she's , like , yeah , you're gonna get your money's worth , you're gonna get that close to him . We're running down there . I was like okay , because I'm like six strings deep at this point and we run down there and I got some awesome fucking pictures of him like that's my background and we were that's probably the closest I've ever been to him and it was fucking awesome and he could smell you from there probably the pheromones sploosh the booze my baby , my poor baby her water broke .
BobboI was just like , oh my god , and then the oops , sorry and then the uh security guard I just put it on I literally just put it on do not disturb , literally clearly that worked didn't fucking work time to sue apple anyway , no he's on my emergency contact , so it probably went through .
BobboAnyway got super close and then the security guard person or whatever , like came behind us and my sister was taking a selfie and like saw him before he even got to us and he was like okay , you have to go back to your seats . So we went back . And then he was super nice , he came up . He's like did you have to go back to your seats ? So we went back , and then he was super nice . He came up . He's like did you get the shot ? Did you get the pictures ? And we were like , yeah , he's like okay , you just can't stay down there . It's like okay .
MaxDid you give him a text ? Who the fucking security ?
Bobboguard .
MaxThank you .
BobboWould have got her at the stage .
MaxThanks how he just asked the question I had .
BobboNo , only my husband gets butt sex guys and wait , wait for it .
ChadThere's more and he's catching . There's more .
BobboThe roles have swapped no but that was in my book recently , anyway .
ChadThere it is . You knew it , you knew it . Yep , fucking Peggy's back . It's 2024 . It's going to be May .
BobboSo anyway , um , it's 2024 , it's gonna be may , so anyway , wait see , y'all fucked me up , um . After the concert I , at my husband , was like let's listen to justin timberlake . On the way home I was like , really what ?
Maxreally babe what trying to get .
BobboI was like , yeah , dude happening , yeah I was like I finally made you a fan and he said no .
MaxDustin made me a fan . That's how good the concert was . He was trying to get laid .
BobboThat's all that was . I mean he gets laid lots regardless .
ChadDude , ew Dude Dude .
BobboSo yeah , it was really fucking good . And then a month later , my poor baby got arrested .
Justin Timberlake's DUI Incident
ChadWait , what happened oh ?
Bobbookay .
MaxNot her actual relationship . No , that would have been a better story .
ChadNo , she's alluding to the fact that somebody with A billion dollars doesn't have the wherewithal To hire a fucking car . So he's a piece of shit . Are you going to be a defender of ? Wait , I don't know what's going on .
BobboJustin Timberlake got arrested , like two weeks ago , for a DUI .
ChadWhat a fucking idiot . If she feels bad for him , she's going to go visit him in jail , get him a conjugal , Even though he was out the same day , yeah , because that's what money does , right ? I think it's really funny that the rich fucks in the hamptons are like this cop's enforcing the laws . We don't like him because he does his fucking job . Fuck these bitches and fuck , fuck this . Fuck this cunt for for not hiring a fucking car . That is some in the middle of the fucking day . Who's ?
Bobboday drunk and goes for a fucking stroll . What did you see ?
Chadthe perp walk was in the middle of the fucking day ma'am . Was that the next ?
Bobboday , I thought it was at night I don't know time to find out .
ChadIt's gonna ruin the tour , it's gonna ruin the tour ?
Bobboruin the tour , what tour ? Yeah , that's the correct question .
ChadI guess that is the funniest fucking thing I've ever heard is some some gen zer arrests this guy . He's like it's going to ruin the tour .
BobboWhat tour ? Who gives a ?
Chadfuck about you bitch Drunk driving piece of shit .
BobboMy poor baby . No , your poor baby your poor baby needs to hide a little the consequences of his actions .
MaxConsequences are a bitch . I don't have to do shit , I just got to sit back . Just let them do their thing .
BobboFucking fuck that bitch I mean I don't agree with his actions , Obviously .
ChadYeah , because he's a piece of shit , but he should be forgiven .
BobboNo , he shouldn't Fuck that guy . The only difference between him and myself is he got caught .
ChadHe has a ton of money .
BobboNo , he got caught , true . True , you've never driven under the influence .
MaxNo .
BobboBut it would have ruined the podcast if you got in jail because you still wouldn't be out .
ChadHe's a piece of shit had .
MaxI been caught Right . I was a piece of shit not that long ago , rude . I don't know why she didn't think that was going to be sad , rude .
BobboYes , 12.37 am local time .
ChadOkay , so I guess it was at night . That's when he got caught every photo I saw of him was during the day , as I'm like , oh yeah , that's after he got released .
BobboHe just spent , he just had a little , had a little sleepover and then got out the next day sounds like he should have had a little taxi , fucking cab because he's got enough money for that right , so I I was talking to dumb as shit .
MaxIs that where he lives ?
Bobboor my bestie . No , he was neither . He was visiting . Yeah , there was a party . It's it's , was he ?
Maxvisiting that chick from new orleans where he was holding her oh , don't fucking go there .
BobboHe was so drunk in that video again , what , what ?
Chadnow , oh , was he making friends ? No , he couldn't fucking stand up .
BobboBourbon street got the best of him and he leaned on somebody and everybody's like , oh he's cheating he probably was his co-star in the movie .
ChadThey were right , they were shooting also .
BobboHe probably was , yeah no wasn't his hand in her back pocket . No , you're fucking grasping at straws , right now like he was grasping at that ass .
ChadYeah , well done well .
BobboHe was on the wrong side of the lake . Who who ?
Maxsays Howie doesn't add anything .
ChadYou , everybody .
BobboAnyway , yeah , I don't know , I don't agree with his actions .
ChadI think it was very stupid .
BobboYeah , but I mean , it happens Lots of people have gotten duis right .
ChadHow many of those people have have the , uh , the means to not have to fucking deal with that ?
BobboI mean he still had to deal with it . He had a sleepover . That's not what I mean yeah other people that aren't rich get put in jail . Well , there's that . He did . No , not for just one night yeah , yeah , that's called a drunk tank for a reason that's usually not for the drunk drivers . It depends on when the court is available to see you is how long you go .
ChadI don't know . I don't even know if I'm right . I've not experienced this .
BobboI don't even know if I'm right , but the judge saw him next morning .
ChadWhat was his BAC ?
BobboHe didn't blow .
MaxWell , not the machine .
ChadSo they took him into the .
BobboYeah .
ChadThat doesn't track .
BobboHe didn't blow .
ChadThen at some point they will still need to collect said evidence other than this . Ginger dude said so .
BobboHe ran a stop sign and swerved from what I read .
ChadI mean , there's that .
BobboOh my gosh . Which , by the way . There's a hysterical parody on the Facebook , so funny .
ChadOf what ?
BobboOf Bye , bye , bye , but instead of Bye , bye , bye , it's DUI . Oh my gosh , hysterical . Not that I'm on that person's side , my poor baby .
ChadIt sounds like you like it enough to have given it a watches , which thereby yeah and endorse it . Yeah , you not even endorse this . And now we're going to have to go find it , even though I don't really want to listen to it , because that song is a bit of an earworm Even though I don't really want to listen to it , because that song is a bit of an earworm . It is indeed . That's not always a good . I mean , there's a lot of bad songs that are like that .
BobboI'm not saying anything . I don't need to hear anything . You don't have to agree that it's good .
MaxYeah , I know , but it is an earworm . It's a 20-year-old earworm at this point . Yeah , it's just old enough to drink and drive .
ChadYeah , sure enough . I actually want to say how old is that ? Wasn't that 99 ? Uh , 99 in 2000 .
Bobbo2001 . Somewhere in there they just celebrated an anniversary 25 .
ChadYeah , I'm thinking 25 , 25 makes sense if they're doing an anniversary it's 25 because they were out when Britney was blowing up . Why are we in ?
Bobbo2024 ? It doesn't even know what I'm talking about . He's so beautiful . Always has been .
ChadLook at that ramen headed fuck .
MaxIs that when it became a hit ? Or is that when it was released in 2000 on no strings attached ? Still old enough to drink and drive ? Oh , absolutely old enough to drink and drive . You never hear about the , so , lance .
ChadBass tried to be a Russian cosmonaut and that failed because they don't like gay people there . Justin is Justin and Joey Fat One is doing Joey Fat One things that dude's fucking funny man he's legitimately funny and he'll get on stage with fucking . Steel Panther here and there , like when they're they happen to be in the same place , like consistently . He'll show up and get on stage with fucking Steel Panther . Here and there , like when they're In the same place , like consistently , he'll show up and get on stage and sing .
MaxHe was on Impractical Jokers too , a couple times
Max Martin: The Swedish Hitmaker
MaxSense of humor .
ChadHe's hosted some shows also , which is a weird gap .
MaxI remember he hosted something . I'm trying to remember what it was he's got a good kind of MC type of presence no . No , no , no , it's Steve Harvey . Steve Harvey and Steve Harvey's like the man you don't , steve .
BobboHarvey's unbeatable . No , of course it's Steve Harvey , but he All right , let's see For people not old enough to remember fucking .
ChadOh , God damn it . What On the ?
BobboJoe .
ChadBiden no .
MaxOh , I know who you're talking about Richard Dawson .
ChadYeah , richard Dawson , richard Dawson .
MaxAnd then Louis Anderson took it over .
BobboOh , why did Joey Fatone leave ? Family Feud Just popped up in my searches , ha .
MaxThey're listening . Well , in that case he's forgettable . Eh , I can deal with that .
BobboFatone has hosted Food Network's Rewrapped Game Show . Networks , common Knowledge , live Well Networks , my Family Recipe and the Price is Right . Live Some shit .
ChadI didn't hear Family Feud in the list . I didn't hear anything that I wouldn't , and none of that that I've watched . So he was in interim prices right before they landed on Drew Carey .
MaxNo , there's a live show that runs around that tours . He's done the live show .
ChadJoey Fatwin , there he is . No , the dude .
MaxMuch respect to the Fatwin .
ChadHe's not even that fat . He's just fat compared to the other ones .
BobboFatone is his last name .
MaxYeah , fatwin , f-a-t space , I'm sure he's sick of hearing that too Poor baby .
ChadThat's another poor dude From 2010 to 2015 .
BobboThat too , but poor baby , that's another . From 2010 to 2015 . That way , thank you , thank you . I knew my childhood wasn't a fucking lie . Oh no , you're not a child as the announcer , not as the host . I am a young lady . He wasn't the host , he was an announcer .
ChadFuck that shit , who gives a fuck ?
BobboI knew I saw him , though I knew I saw him , did you ?
Maxsee him . I'd like to . He saw the announcer so you know what the guy who announces the price is Right . Guy looks like Motherfuckers . What was his name ? He ?
Chadwas on Dancing with the Stars .
MaxThat's probably the reality TV that's trying to creep into my head .
ChadHe was on an episode of Celebrity Family Feud .
BobboDidn't watch it . I probably did .
ChadBoy band versus girl group , so it was probably all of NSYNC . If I would have to .
BobboNo , it was probably like rando boy band .
Chadpeople Like 98 Disease and those guys Like one of each right . Picking a couple here and there . We're researching , we're going to find out .
MaxIt's going to take a while to find out the lineups . Who would be the boy band ? Now ? Every decade's kind of had their boy band thing . How about now ?
ChadOne Direction's passed .
MaxThere's a bunch of .
BobboAsian ones right now . That's different K-pop is .
MaxI really feel like that's different . It's the same meat grinder , but it's different .
ChadIt's like Menudo is still going around .
BobboIt's not just tasty soup . Let's find out .
MaxWhat is popular now , if you don't know , obviously .
ChadIt can't be that popular . No , I literally only listen to Justin's album .
BobboI literally don't listen to anything else .
ChadJesus .
BobboIt's really great .
MaxYou're not even listening to Taylor Swift , stuff Fuck no , she had one good album in my opinion . Gotcha which one was that ? Damn it . Swifties are going to come after us .
BobboReputation , I think , is what it was called . That was like four ago .
MaxFirst off , I'm not the target .
BobboSecond off Is that yes album ?
Maxyes , there's been three or four albums that she's done . That I've really actually very much enjoyed .
BobboYou're a Swifty no .
MaxI said that I enjoyed the album .
ChadIs it the one where it's that same dude , the same ?
Maxfucking .
ChadSwedish guy that wrote more than half of the songs on it .
MaxI don't know Depends on which one you're talking about .
BobboReputation was good .
ChadThe big hit songs , songs the big catchy songs are midnight .
MaxThere's one fucking dude that actually writes them really like shake it off .
BobboShe didn't do shit with that that's a guy .
ChadHey , taylor , swift writes all of her own . No , you , you're , you're wrong . There's a , there's a fucking viking , who is , who is single-handedly writing all of like dude , no , look , seriously , look this fucking dude up . There's a dude who is so prolific , a such a prolific current songwriter that if there's something on the like in the top 100 , the odds are he's got . He's got a fucking hand in it yeah he's got a . He's got a pinky toe in the butthole of that song .
MaxThat's been the same way for forever , like there's always been somebody like that in every decade um the fuck , I don't so no , there's , there's a .
BobboYeah , it's K-pop . That's what's popular now .
MaxK-pop is a big old deal . Oh , you're still on that question . Yeah , my bad , we're on the other question .
ChadYeah , it's just . Who's the fucking Viking writing all the pop songs ?
Maxnow hey intern , what the fuck .
ChadHe's fucking typing like a Viking . There's another one with an actual . Like is Stockholm , sweden , fuckin' A-Ride . Look at me , go hey . Look , shake it off . That was a really loud clack , I'm sorry . Yeah , I called you . I fuckin' called you , bitch .
BobboFuckin' Jesus strikes again and that guy looks like .
ChadChrist himself .
BobboFuck me running . I'm glad that you know so much about I know a lot of weird shit .
ChadI don't know shit about swift other than this guy writes right , wrote some of her most popular songs . He has credits for katie's , katie perry's , I kissed a girl and roar yep , yep um taylor swift shake it off and blank space yep , both of those winding the biggest things ever save your tears by the weekend .
MaxYep , yeah , so basically everybody's major and Blank Space Yep , both of those Winding Light and Save your Tears by the . Weeknd Yep , yeah .
ChadSo basically everybody's major hits , the biggest songs in the past decade is that guy .
BobboThis one fucking white man from Sweden . What's his name ? Max Martin .
ChadWhich I think is .
BobboOh yeah , I've heard of him .
ChadI feel like Carl Martin Sandberg is his actual name Professionally . Professionally he's known as max martin , so he's that's . His stage name is max martin , it's less . Uh , I don't know . So I mean you got to give the dude credit , because that that's the guy that's . Actually he's got a credit for it's gonna be me thank you okay .
BobboYeah , I knew I had heard of him . I was trying to google .
ChadI'm not as fast as you oh so , so really , you don't , don't love Justin , you love this man
The Boy Band Era Discussion
Chad. Wait , no , okay , that's why he took your place as intern , by the way .
BobboI remember this story .
ChadOh .
BobboThere's a story behind why he mispronounced me .
ChadYeah , he said it . On Hot Ones yeah , it's not that guy , it's not .
BobboIt's another one Okay .
ChadThe producer told them to do it that way . Now , if you go watch the hot ones with NSYNC being bitches , Of course I did that .
BobboOf course I watched that , Oddly enough .
ChadNSYNC on there was kind of funny . It was fun Shut up . I love them . You're really just fucking splooshing about it . Seat's wet . Imagine us in a room being interviewed by somebody , having to eat progressively hotter sauces , right , and giving each other shit while doing so . It was like that , which is what made it fun . Hot ones is hilarious , justin on . That was actually incredibly boring compared to the other ones .
BobboOkay , okay , okay .
ChadWe're going to Minnesota .
MaxI literally he could be sitting in a room by himself pulling his own finger and farting , and to her that's fucking entertainment .
ChadYou're not wrong , must you just ?
Maxbe sitting there . Fucking walk up , walk up . Look , I flicked that thing down .
BobboWent down that far .
ChadYou say that , but no , it's not .
MaxSo yeah , no , that guy we just dedicated like 45 minutes to Justin Timberlake and Max Martin .
BobboAnd T-Swift .
ChadAll of whom owe their careers to this motherfucker right here .
MaxWell , Taylor had .
ChadShe moved to pop with him . Yes , this guy got her into the pop market , which is what really got her out of the fucking Shania Twain boot- . Kicking shit , kicking like shania grass licking fucking weirdos window licking dude grass , go , go , go , listen to some fucking country song .
MaxIt's , it's just , it's , it's just trailer park pop man now it's the fucking everything post garth really so outside of the 90s , I'll go with that .
ChadThe past 15 .
BobboYou don't like Jelly Roll ? Oh , he's awesome , but he's more blues Than country . Are we making those ?
Chaddistinctions now , I don't know , I don't see him with . Blues Based off of the name . I don't know anything about the person , but it sounds like they clearly could have appropriated . No , this is an industry plant . That's what this is . This guy's an industry plant .
MaxHe knows somebody Gotta be .
ChadI came up with Nashville's Jelly Roll .
MaxWell , he looks like a jelly roll .
ChadNo , he doesn't he looks like Primalone ? Fuck that guy . Supposedly he's't he looks like Pre Malone ? Fuck that guy . Supposedly he's a great guy . Oh Jesus Fucking needs to get some Ozempic . God damn it . No , he's going to fucking die of a heart attack in three years . Look at that shit . That is a 500 pound man . They make reality shows about shit like that , not like I'm a singer my life's so hard because I'm a fat book .
BobboHe just came out and said recently that he was on a weight loss journey . Yeah , he should be .
ChadOtherwise he's going to fucking die . That's what happens when you weigh that much . Fuck me , that's dangerous . Welcome to full pelican it is that dude's arm is the size my thigh ?
MaxI don't know if he might have been pushing that up , because I saw that picture too .
ChadIt looked like he was kind of pushing it , doesn't matter If you got enough mass there to make it the same size as my thigh . Something is amiss , sir . Big tit .
MaxI thought you said big tit . He probably has them .
ChadHe's probably got bigger tits than fucking Bobbo Bobbo . I'm struggling that dude's got C-cups .
MaxBy the way , you need to use your full Pelican money to get breast augmentation .
ChadWhat no ?
MaxWhy .
ChadWhy not no ? I mean I can think of several reasons . Why not ? Don't you remember that I'm like ?
Bobboteam the way God made you , don't you remember ?
MaxLet's talk about that . No , can't use that phrase , god damn it . What I'm thinking is we can liposuction Howie's tits .
BobboWhat is wrong with you ?
ChadI don't know , go get a beer . That's not going to help .
BobboYes , it is . No , it isn't .
ChadI promise you it's not , and then we can inject it into your chest .
BobboNo , I have heard that nowadays , you can take fat from other parts of your body and put it there . That's the only thing I'd do .
ChadThat body and put it there .
BobboThat's the only thing I do , uh that seems like a temporary thing maybe , but I would not do like implant implants . Yeah , they're dangerous , no , they're not , but okay okay , look up , uh , implant illness , it's a thing oh , all right , all right .
ChadIntern let's go . Implant illness let's look I really don't want to look this up , then don't do an image search , you fucker Jesus . Implant illness .
MaxI don't think that's what he means .
ChadI think he doesn't want to get into this one . It's not an official medical diagnosis . That's the AI overview , saying this is not a medical diagnosis .
BobboWell , let's just leave medicine up to AI . I got my tits done . My eyes are dry .
ChadNow that's a symptom they list there . Motherfucker , what is that source ? The Cleveland Clinic ? Is this the Cleveland Clinic that only does plastic surgeries ? This is clevelandclinicorg . What do they do ? I don't know , I see .
BobboThings in Cleveland .
ChadYeah , what leads you to believe ?
Maxthat man .
BobboAnyway , oh shit .
ChadIt's anyways .
MaxWell , no , we're talking about breasts .
BobboNo , I just Tits . I hit my fucking microphone on accident .
ChadNo , I'm for not having some plastic inserted in place .
MaxYeah , good Penile implant .
ChadYeah , I don't need a , a wiener fucking . Why not ?
Maxbecause it's weird is it , though , all right ? So , according to the cleveland clinic , it's how many people do you ?
Chadwant to talk to about it , fucking everybody but nobody wants to hear about that .
MaxWe're on a podcast , we're talking to everybody .
ChadWell , that's what I'm talking about . I'm talking about in general , like in your , in your day-to-day life . I was going into surgery oh why , I'm going to get my fucking wiener pump .
MaxI didn't even know breast implants could get sick .
BobboNo , no , come on now .
ChadIt sounds to me more like this happens . The person gets sick because it's fucking toxic .
BobboWell , I mean , if you've got a breast implant .
MaxThe breast implant gets sick .
ChadIf it was toxic everybody who had their tits done would would have the same series of of things . This sounds like people with with an , with some underlying autoimmune disorder , autoimmune or inflammatory reaction to parts of the breast implant such as the silicone so they and bacteria .
BobboSo not everybody's compatible with it .
MaxSo yeah , so it sounds like somebody fucked up the surgery or they're fucked up in some other way . There's an allergic reaction to silicone . That is a thing .
ChadYeah , but you should know that before you get some fucking surgery . Call me crazy . My breasts got three times bigger than they were , because I'm allergic to breasts . And the other thing is comparing the procedure from the OGs back in the early 90s to now . Is that just a different ? I mean , is it ?
Chadstill fucking weird well , you remember , like like the old days where you'd see some bolt-on tits and they look fucking weird , but now , like now , they're doing reconstructive surgery . It's like Olivia Munn recently had to have a mastectomy because of breast cancer yeah and then get them fixed by a plastic surgeon because her job is to be attractive and act things . Where's she been ?
Chadexactly where I just told you , uh , dealing dealing with with breast cancer and getting getting having your boobs yeah having her boobs cut off and then put back on because otherwise she was going to die gotcha , that's that's , that's where she's been . She's dealing with that shit . She's , she is , she still is I agree with you , is she ?
Maxi't seen her . I literally have not seen her .
ChadWell , yeah , I mean , she's never not been .
BobboShe posted a thing a while ago .
MaxAll right . Who's the other one ? No , the redhead that was on G4 TV .
ChadOh , I don't recall .
MaxMorgan Webb .
ChadShe wasn't redheaded . Yes , she was . No , she's not Morgan Webb , morgan Webb . She wasn't red headed Morgan Webb , but you see the picture of her With her glasses and a hospital gown . That's her posting about Her boob issues . But hey , man , do your thing , raise awareness , get your t-shirts squeezed . That looks like some brown hair . If I ever saw it , morgan Webb does look like she has brown hair .
MaxGoodness gracious , that's the lighting that looks like some brown hair .
ChadIf I ever saw it , morgan Webb does look like she has brown hair .
MaxThird picture Goodness gracious , that's the lighting . It's also still brown .
ChadThat's the lighting I'm used to . It's also still brown . I think she went through a few hair colors whenever she was on G4 . Maybe All I see is there's some collegiate athlete with some fucking quads man Holy shit . That was the two hotties from g4 tv . That was nerd spank bank . Well , I mean , olivia was first , she got famous , and well , morgan both of them .
ChadAttack of the show was one and uh morgan webb was seemed like she actually did adam sessler and morgan webb and yes , morgan webb actually did know her games , I think olivia munn was more of a plant . Yeah , well , I mean you got to get the nerds there somehow .
MaxWell , it worked because both of those two were hotties . Yeah , yeah , I used to watch that I could care less about the games . I don't have anything to add Of course not , because you were too busy up Justin Timberlake's ass .
BobboExcept that my husband used to watch it . Yeah , that , justin Timberlake's ass . Except that my husband used to watch it . Yeah , that's right , that's why he watched it .
ChadThis is why that's
'90s Celebrity Crushes and Playboy
Chadit . That's 100% why . It's the same reason why people watched what was Jenny McCarthy on MTV . The thing where she was , her job was to be a hot , big , titty blonde who does random things . She was the wild card character .
BobboWhat the ?
Chadfuck was that Ridiculousness . No , like she was the wild card character . What the fuck was that Ridiculousness ?
BobboNo , this is so the remote control game with Colin Quinn perhaps .
ChadPossibly , possibly .
BobboWe're talking 25 years ago we're talking , these two were born . I was barely born .
ChadYou were tickling somebody's nutsack .
BobboNo , not yet . I was only like three .
ChadI don't know when this show was .
MaxI want to say it was like 93 , 94 , somewhere around there .
ChadI had Jenna McCarthy posters in my room in 97 , 98 , which would have been the time that she was prime MTV time .
MaxBefore she started doing her vaccines . Cause autism .
ChadI know what I'm talking about . I'm Dr Jenny . Look at my titties .
MaxKathy , ireland was fucking knockout . Still is , still is .
BobboAlright . I can't relate to any of this , but I guess it's only fair .
MaxI was going to say we went through your bullshit , no , let's go through ours .
ChadThe Sports Illustrated model of the 90s . My goodness . I mean really it's the only thing that ever sold . That Sports Illustrated as a magazine died 30 or 40 years ago . It's only been sold by like the whole subscription revolves around the swimsuit edition .
MaxWell , it's because at that point I mean , that was the closest thing you were going to get to porn without and that and that .
ChadYeah , because the Internet wasn't , wasn't a thing . You couldn't just go download movies , you'd have to go find them or steal your dad's videotapes . No , no See , I never did that . I was always nervous I was going to find one . Wasn't , was homemade Yep that would be rough . Now , we never owned a video camera . I don't care .
MaxMy dad was smart . He bought one of those scramblers Cable scramblers back in the day .
ChadYou have your dish in the backyard .
MaxNo dish .
ChadThis came through cable I remember we could get HBO with the box , because it was just a broadcast signal back in the day . The olden days , Bobo , when you could pirate shit and they couldn't catch you because they couldn't tell you you were doing it .
MaxYou didn't buy cable because you just hooked in to your neighbor's cable and all was well .
ChadIt's a different ballgame . But you couldn't just go find porn like you can now I know .
MaxYou had to dig for that shit .
ChadI know , yeah , you kept a stash somewhere .
MaxAnd the Sports Illustrated Was definitely in that run .
ChadIt stayed because it got racier . It continues to get racier over the years . It's just closer and closer to what Playboy was .
MaxNow .
ChadPlayboy doesn't even do anything .
MaxI was going to say do we ever talk and I think we have before talked about the Playboy and the people that have been in it ?
BobboOh , I feel like we have .
ChadI mean we've talked briefly about Debbie and Tiffany .
MaxThose are the only two that matter .
ChadNo , there's a lot of careers that launched out of Playboy . I mean , look at Pam Anderson . She's only famous because she was in that and then from that jump to Baywatch .
MaxNicole Nicole Eggert . No from that jump to Baywatch . Nicole Eggert no , anna Nicole Smith . Yeah , anna Nicole Smith , yeah , she's another one Poor .
Bobbothing .
ChadYeah , she died . Well , I mean , she probably got more famous from marrying an oil tycoon and him dying than her actual body of work . Elsewise Planned , planned , no , he was 90 . He feels like 95 . He just wanted some big titties in his face as he died .
MaxI don't blame him , like 95 , he just wanted some big titties in his face as he died .
ChadI don't blame him , I didn't say she's probably nuttier than squirrel turds . He wasn't , he wasn't getting it up . This was before viagra was a thing . This dude was just there to like have have some hot bitch next to him while he took the fucking bucket and you know he had the money to pay for it .
ChadAnd then the kids are like hey , where's my inheritance ? What ? Why is my mom younger than me ? What the fuck no , arguably some good questions now . Should the old man have have signed everything over to her ? Probably not that was he knew that was going to go poorly for everybody through a strainer but he wasn't going to be around to see it , so why does it ?
Chadmatter to him well , that's , you know , that's , that's hold my beer ? I don't know , but I mean I I'd say the kids definitely hada case there , but I don't know . He was bewitched by these huge fake titties . He got smothered . He was hypoxic . I would have been there and Nicole Smith was one of my .
MaxHis blood went all to the wrong head . She was one of my top picks back in the 90s man . She was .
ChadYeah , she's good to look at Big old rack and that was her stick .
MaxCertainly some posters there .
ChadYeah Well , yeah , you know , I mean , you know , I had to keep it somewhat reasonable .
MaxI didn't have any real pictures like posters on my wall at all .
ChadJenny was all over mine because she's 98 .
MaxIf I would- have , it would have been Kathy Ireland for sure , because Kathy she's just hot , I had posters , her fucking jawline .
ChadNobody asked you had bed sheets that got fucking dampened up .
BobboNo , no , I had a poster of Leo and a poster of Justin .
MaxThat's what we said .
ChadAnd a pillow and three fingers .
BobboNo , not until I was out of the poster phase , at least .
MaxYeah , when she was 10 , 11 . I don't know 12 .
ChadSee , I also forget that this was . It was a different time .
MaxWhen .
ChadBeing the age that I am and you are Posters were it was your way of expressing yourself .
MaxThat is all you had .
ChadYou had your room and that was it , so you put whatever up you wanted to , and boys was either sports or bitches .
BobboOr both or bands . It's music was either sports or bitches , or both . No , no , or bands .
ChadIt's music , sports or babes . That's the trifecta . It's one of the three .
BobboYou can't have several no .
MaxWhy not ? What if you're into different things ? You didn't cross the streams .
ChadYou can be into different things , but one of them is more or less what you're going to be into you're either the music guy , you're like the kid who wore the trench coats and the Doc Martin boots , that would be the music . Well , I mean earlier in the decade you'd wear flannels and smell like patchouli , oh lord . And then if you're a sports guy , you're a sports guy .
MaxYeah , you had sports , otherwise people uh , poses of people footballing , yeah , or b-ball players and jordan posters were right , yeah , but yeah , no .
ChadSo those , those , those are the types of posters you were going to have as a kid now . Now I went from bands to babes .
BobboAh , so you transitioned .
ChadYeah , as I got older , I was like I don't need a Grateful .
MaxDead poster on my wall .
ChadHow about this big titty bitch in a bikini ? The three Bs .
Teenage Room Decorations and Posters
BobboI had Justin and Leo , and then I had NSYNC .
ChadI'm quite sure now which Leo .
BobboLeonardo DiCaprio from Titanic .
ChadDo you think I meant the fucking Ninja Turtle ? Fuck you you think ?
BobboI kissed a fucking turtle tonight .
MaxI don't know weirder things have happened . You never know when it's fucking Gilbert Grape , turtle , goodnight , I don't know .
ChadWeirder things have happened . You never know when .
BobboIt's fucking Gilbert Grape , liz , but anyway , and then at some point skating rinks were a thing .
MaxYeah , before you were born .
BobboAnd when I was fucking born . And now , and now so anyway , I would go to the skating rink like every friday with my older sister and get these stickers , bumper stickers . Oh fuck , bumper stickers oh fuck , oh fuck , and they were like I make boys cry and all that shit like those classic bumper stickers .
ChadI heard that Allie Wait , wait , wait , wait , wait . Start that over , mama I lost the train of thought there .
BobboThe classic 2000s bumper stickers . They were like I make boys cry and I'm too hot to handle and all that shit .
ChadThat's a classic bumper sticker , I'm assuming .
BobboBack in the fucking day , what do I know ? That's all they had at , the Sounds like some toxic bitch fucking bumper stickers . Well , this is who . This is what shaped me , Okay .
ChadThis is where I'm going with this .
BobboI went from posters to having beaucoup of those .
MaxI'm sitting here thinking it was a pair that shaped her On my Rude .
ChadDamn son .
BobboI had a bunch of bumper stickers on my closet instead of posters .
MaxOn her badonkadonk . Oh okay , yeah , like too hot to handle and I make boys cry stickers on my closet instead of posters on our badonkadonk .
ChadOh so okay , like yeah , like two hats I handle and I make boys cry and so you're putting bumper stickers . Those are the only two you remember .
MaxYeah , yeah , okay , I mean they were kind of doing that back in our day too .
ChadI don't recall that because I didn't put I I didn't put a ton of stuff on my walls other than like the I love new york bumper stickers and shit I was just saying .
BobboI went from that to cliche shit right bumper stickers .
ChadI went from posters , so it sounds like like your door was just a mix of of uh , the equivalent of I love hip-hop .
BobboBorn to shop her .
ChadHer door was her brain this is a pumpkin spice fucking door yeah , of basic it had Uggs on the bottom of it . I love my music .
MaxI'm a flirt cutie pie diva . This is kind of what it looked like it had fur in the middle those aren't bumper stickers yes , they are well
Chadokay well , they're stickers . They're stickers . You can put them on a bumper , but I can . I know exactly what you're talking about it's like a bastardized Euro sticker In a .
MaxGroovy Days font . It's the prequel to the Chai Bone On shit Chicks rule Let me shop and no one gets hurt .
BobboI definitely had that one . Goddess .
MaxWell , that's it for this episode . So yeah , break , goddess . Well , that's it for this episode . So , um , yeah , break . Break for lunch .
