Full Pelican
A degenerate cast talks about current events make fun of each other and makes light of things most people take seriously. Filthy humor, crap inventions, and sheer stupidity, it's not for the faint of heart or kids.
We are releasing episodes from the season 1 collection. These were recorded from 2021 to 2022 and never previously released. We will release two episodes of season 1 with every season 2 release until they have all been released.
Full Pelican
S1 E1 Chad dies at the end....
Use Left/Right to seek, Home/End to jump to start or end. Hold shift to jump forward or backward.
One of our earliest podcasts (earlier ones coming soon), and the first with Brown, we go places no people should go. And then there is that Chad thing...
Cold Open And Mic Mayhem
SPEAKER_02Prepare yourself for some fucking creepiness. What time is it? I said it was full pelican. Time bitch. Yeah. Okay, hey, you can still zoom in the uh waveform and make it like visible same way. Your mouse is over there. Are you sure? Because you're groping around like a blind man in a in a brothel. Would it? That is you ended up on a thick black cylindrical object again. Yeah, it depends on the other. I don't know why you have such an affinity for these things, but I guess it's just nature. But nature is just oh give it thicker. Thicker, blacker. Just you know.
unknownYou're the worst.
SPEAKER_02I'm the best. Let me get my cup holder before somebody talks about me.
SPEAKER_01You mean coaster?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, coasters are how civilized people have their beverages on table. Coasters anyway? Coasters? Mom? Uh yeah. Yep. Yep. We already went we already went down a long nasty road.
SPEAKER_05Well, he was saying something about black things earlier.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01We missed it though.
SPEAKER_03Did we miss it though? We all have our mouths close to a black thing.
SPEAKER_05So what you're saying is No. Yeah. We lost it. No, I didn't lose it. I thought I thought better of what I was going to say. Probably for the probably for the best.
SPEAKER_02It was definitely for the betterment of everybody around us.
SPEAKER_05Yes. Put your mouth on it.
SPEAKER_01That is what you said earlier. There it is. There it is. Just put your mouth on the black object. That's what you said earlier.
SPEAKER_05He's outside of his thimble regulation for the day.
SPEAKER_03Well, he's already had a drink of beer. I'm right above the label. He's gone. So I'm just getting started. So you like you like pineapple stuff, huh? Yeah. It's good. Oh, okay.
SPEAKER_05So like a look, we're whores here. We're completely whores. And I'm alright with it. You should be able to do it too. Exactly. Yeah. Good.
SPEAKER_02Why does it smell like a demon in here? Caught me off guard.
SPEAKER_01Oh shit. I didn't swallow. It shouldn't smell like that.
SPEAKER_02Well, if you didn't swallow, that's exactly why it would smell like that. Jesus. What happened while we're going to do it? Swallow. What do you do with it?
SPEAKER_03Jesus. That's yeah, you leave it alone for five minutes. Just like a semen every time. Cherry limeade? Oh, that's good.
SPEAKER_01It is.
SPEAKER_03Yeah.
SPEAKER_01What?
SPEAKER_05Where does it there goes the breaks again?
SPEAKER_02So cherry limeade, where oh, because that's what you're drinking. Yeah. Out of nowhere. I was just like, we're thinking like a semen. Well, based off of prior conversations. That doesn't quite work. Yeah, well, based off of prior conversations, I thought he was about to tell me that semen tastes like cherry lime. I mean it might, but I'm not going to find out.
SPEAKER_05Oh, see, I was about to go to a bad place there too.
SPEAKER_02Hit
One Way Sauna Window Shock
SPEAKER_02it. We have we have an edit point.
SPEAKER_01Quit holding back. What the shit?
SPEAKER_05What?
SPEAKER_01Naked hotel guests in South Korea shocked to discover that mirrored glass in sauna was actually see-through.
SPEAKER_02But um I don't want that. I don't think they were really surprised. I think they're just an exhibition.
SPEAKER_04Yeah. What? Oh you came out supposed to look at it.
SPEAKER_03I didn't mean to see your naked body. I'm sorry. Bye-bye.
SPEAKER_01Just thought that was interesting.
SPEAKER_05My body. It's telling me yes.
SPEAKER_01A newlywed.
SPEAKER_05Definitely a yes.
SPEAKER_01They were they're undergoing counseling after being told that the windows in the luxurious spot were only one-way glass.
SPEAKER_04Oh no. See, that's when I was. Somebody saw my body. I need help. I need to save someone.
SPEAKER_03Definitely go back and like I'll put a I'll just put my ball sacks on the window. Be like, hey, here you go, buddy.
SPEAKER_05Wait, was there an animal? That was a plural. That was a plural. Ball sacks. Did I say that? Looks like like fucking Holly from Christmas. Don't tell my secret. That's why I had so many things that look different.
SPEAKER_04So so since we're here already, let's go ahead.
SPEAKER_05Do we have a sack per testicle? Or is it multiple sacks with multiple presents?
SPEAKER_03The ladder.
SPEAKER_05Yep. So you're more production multiball. Yeah. Yep. Right. How many kids do you have? Don't answer that.
SPEAKER_03So it's like a McDonald's uh place place. No, no, no. I can at least count a multiple.
SPEAKER_01It came in my hand. It just kept happening. Hey, I mean, women have two uteruses.
SPEAKER_05It's thermodynamics, Bobby.
SPEAKER_01Huh?
SPEAKER_05It's thermodynamics.
SPEAKER_01Okay. I'm just saying there are multi-reproductive females. So it could stand that there are multi-reproductive males as well.
SPEAKER_05Cool story, bro.
SPEAKER_01I'm just saying.
unknownOkay.
SPEAKER_01Apparently there was one lady that had two vaginal openings and two uteruses. Fucking nuts as shit, right? Crazy.
SPEAKER_05That's that's where the what is a vagina? The box the dick comes in.
SPEAKER_01That took me way too long.
SPEAKER_06That took me way too long.
SPEAKER_05Gives new gives new meaning to the the word cockpit.
SPEAKER_03Oh gosh. The word cock is such a 90s word.
SPEAKER_01Where the fuck did that come from?
SPEAKER_03Brakes, buddy.
SPEAKER_02Pump the brakes. I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_01Did you bring us a bag of dicks?
SPEAKER_02Yes.
SPEAKER_03Is that a several bags of simple budgets? Would you like plastic or paper? Rubber bag. Oh rubber. Rubber.
SPEAKER_05Well, I guess we'll make that. I tried the plastic bag, it didn't work well. Balloons don't work well.
SPEAKER_01Oh no. Whoa, whoa, whoa. And isn't it not rubber, isn't it? Latex. That's what little Wayne said.
SPEAKER_02Get you some saran wrap. What?
unknownWhat?
SPEAKER_02I was tuned out. What are we talking about? Saran wrap. You're gonna have to go with that.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Wait.
DIY Protection Talk Goes Sideways
SPEAKER_03Wrap your jimmy, fool. If you don't put a hat on it. Why? I got same thing. So you don't get that latex. You can get a box of saran wrap for $3 or less. Depending on if it's store ran. And paint.
SPEAKER_01Saran wrap is not a good thing.
SPEAKER_05If you don't have the reservoir tip, where does it go? Right. Yeah, right. That's what it doesn't matter to him.
SPEAKER_02I mean, yeah, just you reach in there and pull it out, pull it out.
SPEAKER_01Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Just hey.
SPEAKER_01They make never mind. Oh no. So we all know.
SPEAKER_02So I think I think what we're about to learn is that somebody has recently been to adamandeve.com.
SPEAKER_01No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Is it a special? It's a Facebook ad, I think. Pretty positive.
SPEAKER_02Even worse.
SPEAKER_01They make cum sponges now. So that you don't leak all day.
SPEAKER_05Is that a problem normally? Yes. Now this is new to me. I'm not even fucking with you. This is totally new.
SPEAKER_01Yes. It's a problem. They make cum sponges so you can go in and get that shit out so that it's not leaking down your, you know, all over your underwear later that day when you sneeze.
SPEAKER_02That's oddly specific. I think I can do better than that. Oh. Pull up a microphone. Let's see what's going on. We might have to wait to release this because we're we might be on the verge of a new business line. Look, guys. I mean.
SPEAKER_03All right. Quit stalling. Let's hear it. Penetrated. I'm all about saving money. I'm for the people.
SPEAKER_00Okay.
SPEAKER_03So I'm about saving my people. The people who are poor. Wait, wait, wait.
SPEAKER_05Okay, your people are people that are poor.
SPEAKER_03No. No, it's what you say. Money are cost efficient people. My people. Okay. So why? Cheap ass bitches. You save my people. Tightwash. Exactly. Why would I go and get a sponge when there's bounty? The quicker picker upper. And I can go and take that bounty, roll that thing up, and stuff it right up there.
SPEAKER_01I don't think it works the same. I'm gonna find the damn sponge.
SPEAKER_05Tell me staying the fuck out of this conversation. This is awesome. Yeah, look, for fuck's sake.
SPEAKER_01I'm fucking. I'm on your network. Should I get off of our network? Oh no.
SPEAKER_02No, the network isn't the problem.
SPEAKER_03I'm a big picture guy.
SPEAKER_02Alright, so paint so paint us a picture. Paint. Oh, oh God.
SPEAKER_06Oh god.
SPEAKER_05No, no, no, no. Now you've got to elaborate even more.
SPEAKER_02So now I'm just imagining some poor woman running around like she's got a runny runny vagina. Instead of the case, stuff a tissue in your nose or something.
SPEAKER_05And then you've got the game as kids, you know, the slap to somebody with the bounty napkin that's been used.
SPEAKER_01Our fucking visionary shows.
SPEAKER_05Is that a thing? I'm making it up as we go. I mean, shit, if you're poor people, you tend to do it. The common gone. That's what it's called. Jesus Christ.
SPEAKER_01So I gotta spend 20%.
SPEAKER_03Is this public?
SPEAKER_01That's what it's called.
SPEAKER_03Is this public? What's it called? No.
SPEAKER_01The common gone.
SPEAKER_03Nope. I don't like that name.
SPEAKER_01We're on a mission to ban dripping forever.
SPEAKER_05Awkward Essentials. That's gross. So is it for moisture and or cumsies?
SPEAKER_01No, mostly cumsies. Oh, I really like this. Oh, that's a word. You should see something.
SPEAKER_02So my browser, as after searching for that, is like, hey, images for come and gone. Oh, geez. It's a lot of pixels. Right. A lot well, a lot of square pixels, but I know what they're doing.
SPEAKER_01They're
Cum Sponges And Terrible Branding
SPEAKER_01sure about that, buddy. Awkward essential stuff. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Speaking of, uh, see, I call mine like Moist Monster.
SPEAKER_01I'm just saying.
SPEAKER_03That's not the sponge, that's the penetrator.
SPEAKER_01The moist monster. The moist monster, yeah, because it's already prelude before it goes in.
SPEAKER_03Oh, that's a monster for moisture. I thought I had a good idea going on. So anyway. Well, you do with the moist monster, but it's not the same. And I don't even know where.
SPEAKER_02The moist monster is not is not going to absorb cum. It is going to leave it and then be gone. So really it could it could be the come and gone. But that's just every guy, everyone, exactly. Thank you, Bobby. Well, you managed to keep yours around.
SPEAKER_05It's crayons.
SPEAKER_01What? Fuck off with that shit. It's just more editing. Fucking stop with the fucking crayons.
SPEAKER_05I'm killing myself. I'm right here.
SPEAKER_03I'm dying. They're so tasty. Well, y'all see where I'm going here, huh? Not really.
SPEAKER_01Well, you started with saran wrap and ended with moist monsters. I don't think we really went anywhere, to be honest.
SPEAKER_06I'm just saying. It's like just circles.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_06Just we're fucking retarded. Just running around. I got you.
SPEAKER_02Ken, you're it.
SPEAKER_03Wow.
SPEAKER_00Well, this is a waste of the stuff.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Oh, the moist monster. That's going to come back to haunt us. Oh.
SPEAKER_05Oh, wait. No, I'm using it. Oh, oh, yeah. Executive decision.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Well, saran ramp.
SPEAKER_05Well, we never finish that. We should probably finish with. So the saran ramp idea is a bad one.
SPEAKER_02Yep. You're going to knock somebody up and do it.
SPEAKER_05You can get knocked up. I'm telling you, if you're in a chip.
SPEAKER_03You have more than one child is not here in life.
SPEAKER_05Wait, wait, wait. Give them a second. Go ahead. Explain. I need the whole process. Yeah. Think about it here.
SPEAKER_03All right. This picture is. Sell me. We're in a moment. And I need to go and get a condom. I don't have a condom. But I know what I do have in that cabinet. Right. And I might have some rubber bands or zip tie.
SPEAKER_01Oh my God.
SPEAKER_03So I know what the fuck?
SPEAKER_01Some fucking kinks are coming out.
SPEAKER_04No, it's the zip tie. It's like, okay, cock ringards not necessary. Or you can make a zip tie right now.
SPEAKER_03Zip tie my dick. So or we can do a bread tie. Whichever one you want. Something blood loss there, you're good. Something that's gonna like, you know. Bread tie implies.
SPEAKER_02So you're gonna put your penis in a tourniquet. Have you been watching MacGyver?
SPEAKER_00Yeah.
SPEAKER_02Because if you add a paperclip, then every turn to add up. He is an inspiration. See? Yeah. Well, that that that's just to that's just to help with the weak thrust game.
SPEAKER_06Oh my god.
SPEAKER_03Why do we always tell me it wouldn't work? Because we are to do it. Tell me it wouldn't work.
SPEAKER_06It wouldn't work. It wouldn't work. It wouldn't work.
SPEAKER_02We've been in all of these situations and sticker time. What?
SPEAKER_01What?
SPEAKER_02Storytime. Talk to me.
SPEAKER_01No, wait, not all of these situations. I don't have fucking bread ties except ties. That's not what I'm in.
SPEAKER_02But rubber bands Taran wrap in shame.
SPEAKER_06And two kids.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, two kids and a couple of couple of cummy sponges. I don't know what order that happens, but fuck.
SPEAKER_01If you use the sponge, I don't feel like it's Oh, God. No, that is not a concept of the device. That is not.
SPEAKER_02No, that is that is a that is an ejaculate absorbent. Absorber. And you are gonna end up pregnant with a moldy sponge sitting in your bedstand. Somebody's gonna come over and be like, oh, I needed a sponge to do the dishes. No, not that one.
SPEAKER_03Anything but that one. Which is the crunchy monster comes in. I'm telling you, that's where the moist monster comes in.
SPEAKER_02So instead of a crunchy cum sponge, you're gonna have a moist cum sponge. That doesn't help.
SPEAKER_03What you can do is get a paper towel, damp it up, and just stuff it in there.
SPEAKER_02That's not a moist monster, that's just a paper towel.
SPEAKER_03Quicker, it's quicker, and it's picking, picker it up. Upper. Okay. I'm telling you.
SPEAKER_06Again, I don't think we're supposed to talk about brands, first of all.
SPEAKER_04Well, I think, dude, I don't even know who to look at now. I'm so fucking confused. Oh, what the fuck's going on? Oh no.
SPEAKER_01We had a bonding moment earlier, and now we're just we're bouncing shit off of each other.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, a bonding moment on semen extraction. I'm telling y'all, this is gonna go somewhere. No, it's not. We can bring this up. It already went somewhere.
SPEAKER_01They already have it.
SPEAKER_03We can bring this. It went somewhere that nobody wanted to go.
SPEAKER_01Awkward essentials document.
SPEAKER_03Disguise to me.
SPEAKER_01Pack of whatever for 25 bucks.
SPEAKER_03Yep. That's an edit. Pack of whatever.
SPEAKER_01Pack of whatever. However many. A pack of combos.
SPEAKER_03We can name it dry that thing up. No, not dry that thing up. Thang. Dry that thing up.
SPEAKER_01That would work. I mean, if you're if you're trying to compete with them, sure, let's do it. But there's the market's already taken, I think.
SPEAKER_02Sop it up.
SPEAKER_03Dang, that's another good one.
SPEAKER_02I'm not even thinking about it. Snowballs, etc. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Oh my god. I mean, instead of that, I mean just make it more direct. I mean, people.
SPEAKER_02Well, no, it's pretty direct as it stands. The name is really descriptive. Yeah. It's it's it's uh yeah. I mean, the the next best thing you're gonna get is like a plunger. It's my first day, man. It's my first day. Almond Joy. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Coconut cream. Get that nut out.
SPEAKER_03Oh, that's uh we can take one or two nuts, your call.
SPEAKER_02Well, in his case, my case, yeah. Uh uh might be a uh a baker's dozen. Do you call it a bag? It's the bag of dicks. Well, you know, does it end up being kind of like like a bunch of grapes? The multi-sax syndromes. It's my first day at this stuff, y'all. So your first day as an inventor? Yeah. And you're already stealing somebody else's job? You're fired!
SPEAKER_03There's some more up in there, guys. Just give me a day. There's some more up in there. I guarantee you that.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, that's why you get a cumsie gone, because there's some more up in there. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Right. Yep. That's true.
SPEAKER_03Moist be gone.
SPEAKER_05We can do this. We can do that.
SPEAKER_03That is good. Moist be gone.
SPEAKER_01No, because it's not moisture. It's fucking cum.
SPEAKER_05I like it's like the cum dumpster. The cum dumpster deluxe.
SPEAKER_02Well, no, that's already the recipient of the original load. Dick wipe.
SPEAKER_01Cum garbage man.
SPEAKER_02That's a little bit winded. Yeah, it's a little bit too long. That's what she said. Well, you know.
SPEAKER_01I was just saying on this one. The dumpster. I was just saying, you know.
SPEAKER_02I'm sure it's gonna be profound.
SPEAKER_05I am positive it's going to uh win awards. Yeah, definitely.
SPEAKER_02The lifeboat. It rescues seamen.
SPEAKER_01They're not really rescued, though.
SPEAKER_02No.
SPEAKER_01They're taken out of the bastards.
SPEAKER_02They think they're on to their destiny, and their destiny is to be a crust of fucking. Think about that guy. Sitting in your bedside. Think about that.
SPEAKER_05He's in that group that's like, yeah, we're gonna make. Wait, wait, we got it. We got the secondary line for it. You make the original money off of selling the cum sponge, and then you give a you know how you can put your used toter cartridges in a box and send it back? You can do that for artificial insemination. Fucking ew. Well, there you go.
SPEAKER_02They got banks for that, so go make a deposit.
SPEAKER_01Oh, because it's it would be a deposit because it would be tainted at that point.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, literally and figuratively.
SPEAKER_01For real, though. It has to be a deposit for that.
SPEAKER_02The deposit was made, paid for in cash. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03My blood sweating, tears, and I just had it. Yeah. I think people people need to hear this because they think about this too.
SPEAKER_02Are you doing a public service with your with your voice monster?
SPEAKER_03Yeah. M M. Or M M. I can't say M M. He can't say M M. M-M. Oh no, I don't know.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, Mars Mars Mars Incorporated might have something to say about that.
SPEAKER_01I think.
SPEAKER_03RBI. Oh, an RBF.
Rickroll Gets AI 4K Upgrade
SPEAKER_02Did you see that they uh somebody upscaled Rick Roll to 4K using AI? What? It's amazing. Is it? It's amazing. We're gonna have to listen to it. Shockingly like it, what? 4K. 4K.
SPEAKER_05Okay, no, here's here's the thing. Oh, you mean the video?
SPEAKER_02The video. Oh. They they they upscaled the original Rick Roll, Rick Astley video into full like proper HD.
SPEAKER_05So it was on film and then they proper HD'd it.
SPEAKER_02I don't know. I don't think so. I think I think this was people. Well, it's like the the the wham last Christmas. I don't think it's that. Okay. Is that who made that? Wham? Yeah. Yeah. He loves that song, by the way. Should play it like randomly throughout the year. No, don't do that. Yes. Oh, randomly throughout the year. Just just Christmas. I love wham.
SPEAKER_03Oh, I think Wham's best song was Everything She Wants. I disagree wholeheartedly. Oh, God.
SPEAKER_05The original Freedom is the best song they ever did.
SPEAKER_03Oh, that was just George Michael.
SPEAKER_05No, you're thinking Freedom 94. That was a different song. The original Freedom song was on the Wham Make a Big album. Why am I even talking about this?
SPEAKER_02Because we're talking about uh upscaling Rick Astley to 4K and it's glorious. It really is.
SPEAKER_01Really? That's what she's known for? That's sad.
SPEAKER_02Probably. It's a comeback story.
SPEAKER_03Oh, this this doesn't sound good at all. This is going down the already for that person.
SPEAKER_01It's just a terrible like intro to this little whatever this is.
SPEAKER_02I don't know if it's yeah, we are we're pretty much the worst at everything ever. Mostly talking. Stumbly bumbly. You having trouble there? Who farted?
SPEAKER_05This fucking thing doesn't work.
SPEAKER_02Insert for audio voice. Oh, because it's it's a Bluetooth eater.
SPEAKER_01Oh yeah, she has a TV show now.
SPEAKER_02If it doesn't work with a shit, it needs to go back.
SPEAKER_01Barry Moore. Barry Moore.
SPEAKER_05Is she still relevant?
SPEAKER_01She has a TV show, so no. Who? Whenever you go to daytime TV, that's a no from
Drew Barrymore Debates And Daytime TV
SPEAKER_01me. Oh my god.
SPEAKER_02So true. I'll I'll remind Oprah. I'll remind Oprah of that for you. From her from her private villa on the top on the mountain in Maui.
SPEAKER_01Well, okay, she's the OG though. But like once Like Kelly Clarkson has a show now and Drew Barrymore have a show. Oh, Kelly. That like means that you've fallen off of your original talent. So here's a show.
SPEAKER_02I'm sorry.
SPEAKER_05And from so so I love Steve Harvey. So you can go fuck yourself.
SPEAKER_01Look, I'm pretty sure he was an OG too.
unknownNo.
SPEAKER_01Every time I see that. You know he used to be radio, right?
SPEAKER_03Unless you know this. Every time I see her, I think about chin.
SPEAKER_01Chin?
SPEAKER_03She's always got that chin. Drew Barrymore. Or lack thereof? No, she she's definitely got a chin there, buddy. Well. Example A. Chin. Chin. She's got a very chin.
SPEAKER_01Chin. Chin. Anyway.
SPEAKER_05So what is your favorite Drew Barrymore?
SPEAKER_06Yeah.
SPEAKER_05What's your favorite Drew Barrymore movie? E.T. And I cried at the end, man. Oh, Jesus Christ. You didn't have to do that.
SPEAKER_03You didn't have to go there. I did, man. I missed it.
SPEAKER_01Um 50 First Dates, hands down.
SPEAKER_03Firestarter. Ah, that's that's yeah. I wish I had thought about that one. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01Oh, she's so young in that one.
SPEAKER_03That's why why do you think your fire starter?
SPEAKER_01I've never seen it. I've actually been craving that movie.
SPEAKER_05Craving. She's been craving a movie. Cool, bro.
SPEAKER_03Wait, Drew Barrymore is she's only 45? Only. Wow. I thought she was older than that. Okay.
SPEAKER_01And her middle name is Bleith.
SPEAKER_03She's doesn't she doesn't look bad right here. Yasmin Bleith.
SPEAKER_01Bleith.
SPEAKER_02I haven't seen a recent picture. What's she up to? Cooking claims. She has a show. No, I've seen I've seen Drew Barrymore. Yasmine Bleith? She's letting herself actually age, which I appreciate.
SPEAKER_01Wait, she's age.
SPEAKER_02Who are we talking about, Drew? Who?
SPEAKER_05Yasmine?
SPEAKER_01What?
SPEAKER_02What? Where are you? Where are you?
SPEAKER_05Anyway. Porpoises. Porpoises.
SPEAKER_01I'm still wanting Drew Barrymore in all her movies.
SPEAKER_05Lucky. I am B B. Good thing she's got the sponge.
SPEAKER_01Oh dear gosh.
SPEAKER_02Well, I would assume a lesbian might not need the come and come.
SPEAKER_05I'd swear you'd be wrong, sir. Spaloosh.
SPEAKER_01I wouldn't know, but you act like women don't know.
SPEAKER_05I'll ask my maybe no women you've ever been with. I think that's awesome.
SPEAKER_01Do you really? Yeah, no, she looks like a barrel.
SPEAKER_05She looks like a barrel of whiskey.
SPEAKER_01She was so cute before, though. I'm so mad about it. Can I see pictures? As long as she doesn't do anything.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, that's what I've seen pictures of. Yeah, no, she's cute.
SPEAKER_01She's very cute. You've seen pictures.
SPEAKER_02Well, yeah, no, she's she's the one with the laundry pictures, right? Mm-hmm. Yep. Yeah. I got I got the sneak peek behind the OnlyFans. Yep. There's no OnlyFans. Sorry, Bobo's friend.
SPEAKER_01How much was it a move? She would be.
SPEAKER_02I I used, I used, I pirated her account. Oh okay.
SPEAKER_01She would be a lot better off if she had an OnlyFans. She just not.
SPEAKER_02Well, we'll have to set it up. We'll help her set it up. Explain this OnlyFan thing to me. OnlyFans. You're not familiar with OnlyFans? I am not. Okay. Are you an attractive young lady? No. Well you fucked. Then then you're fucked. Sorry.
SPEAKER_01I'm an attractive older lady.
SPEAKER_02You push. No, I'm I don't know. We're not gonna be mean today. Okay.
SPEAKER_01So you Are you sure you're mean every day?
SPEAKER_02Do you carry your own stuff? I'm not nearly as mean as he is, so you can just shut your whore mouth. Ooh, me or you. Yes. Me? Oh, awesome. I'm a nice guy.
SPEAKER_01This was a recent one as well.
SPEAKER_02Trademark, nice guy. I'm sorry, I'm watching the video. Well, you always call that with assholes. Okay, so do you do you need to understand OnlyFans there? Oh, you gotta look at some attacking. Some TNA. Is that the laundry picture?
SPEAKER_01No, it's a new tiki talkie that she posted.
SPEAKER_05Yeah. Which one is she? Left or right?
SPEAKER_01Blonde.
SPEAKER_05Don't remember on the neither one's blonde.
SPEAKER_01Okay. Darker? Darker? I can't remember. She changes her hair a lot.
SPEAKER_05Look at why what you said makes no sense. Can I can I see a oh she's right.
SPEAKER_00Okay, let's just see.
SPEAKER_05Okay. Did you really just hold up your hands to figure out? The one with the L is left.
SPEAKER_03So there's one left or right.
SPEAKER_02And what is Twonky?
SPEAKER_01Right is who I know.
SPEAKER_02I don't know. There's something wide open. Just party. Uh Twonky Media. I have no idea what it is. There's something I can cast to. We can edit my fucking shit out of this one.
SPEAKER_01Anyway, I'd love you. I'd love you. You mean the vid? Yeah. The TikToky?
SPEAKER_02Oh, I guess you ride up Main Street.
SPEAKER_01I think that was the point.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01I think they were trying to get some business at the bar that night.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, but those that dude looks like he's about 14, so they might need to rethink things.
SPEAKER_01I don't call it Main Street.
SPEAKER_02I call it the Great Device. Why is he wearing gray sweatpants? They're gonna know he's not. Wait, you got ones that carry around their own. Why are you looking at the guys? Yeah, yeah. Because once the girls stop doing stuff, they're the only ones moving. Good cover, bro. Anyway, they're gonna be around. Yeah, so after that, it's just like, you know. I mean, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Well then they're shooting shit. They're shooting. Okay, so here I'm gonna end up.
SPEAKER_02But well, I'm trying to explain it to the ignorant. So in my limited. Holy fuck, I'm ignorant. Yeah, we know.
SPEAKER_01Only on this topic. It's okay.
SPEAKER_02Thank you. Thank you. You're welcome. And really, it's not that. Don't give him that much credit.
SPEAKER_01Gosh. Well, let me kiss a little ass.
SPEAKER_02Nah, he likes the tongue.
SPEAKER_01Fuck.
SPEAKER_02Oh, whoa, whoa. Tongue punch the fart box. Yeah, we've already yeah, see, he remembers now. Yeah. Yeah. Anyway, you learned something about brown shot. Oh, I said tongue dart instead of dart punch. Yeah, that's a pretty weird.
SPEAKER_01Tongue dart.
SPEAKER_02That sounds like shooting it across the room.
SPEAKER_03Like an obscure somebody. Getting the salad and then tossing it. Oh god.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, but the problem is he wants to add he wants to add this fucking creamy dressing to it, which is fucking weird. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, vinaigrette. Vinegarette's a little bit more healthier, so that's I think that's more healthier. It's a raspberry vinaigrette. Yeah. So that's okay. That's called blood.
SPEAKER_01Ew, you had to go there.
SPEAKER_03Bloody anus. Oh, Jesus Christ.
SPEAKER_01What?
SPEAKER_05Where? Oh man. This fucking thing sucks. Yeah. Yeah. How much did you pay for it? Like 60 bucks. Thank you, Amazon, for taking my money again.
SPEAKER_02Well, we'll give it back. Say, you know what? Y'all can have this shit.
SPEAKER_03Yeah, we're going to boycott those guys. Nope, not really. Not really. No. Yeah. The problem is you can't. Because I need them to, you know, produce or sell my moist monster. I need to produce anything. Distribute.
SPEAKER_05I shouldn't say distribute now. So what are you going to call your store? Moist Monster Incorporated. Moist Express Incorporated. Moist Express. Get your moist faster. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Like a moist drive-thru. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05Sunday, Sunday, Sunday.
SPEAKER_03Get a moist stylet. Everybody likes that word, moist. I was actually, I like that. But you gotta say it more essential.
SPEAKER_01Moist. No. No, they don't.
SPEAKER_02No, I sound like a jackass.
SPEAKER_01Anyways.
SPEAKER_02Babble seems to be really enjoying the word moist. No. He's gotta draw it out so that the curry. Moist.
SPEAKER_01Why do you keep staring at me when you say that?
SPEAKER_05I was actually staring at him. He looked at me, so I looked over.
SPEAKER_02You initiated eye contact. Established dominance. Oh, you're not.
SPEAKER_01Oh, I'm just gonna close my eyes for the rest of this recording. Oh, please do. Is that a mushroom? What?
SPEAKER_02Toto came to visit.
SPEAKER_03Look, are we still waiting for this to play?
SPEAKER_02No, no, it's not gonna play. It's not gonna play. Like I've I've since disconnected
Marilyn Manson Claims And Trent Reznor
SPEAKER_02from it. What?
unknownThe horrible people. The horrible people.
SPEAKER_02Oh man. Old Marilyn got himself canceled by being a fucking creep.
SPEAKER_05But was he really a creep? I mean, because look at him. I don't know what you expect. Marilyn may like it.
SPEAKER_01Oh he's always been terrifying.
SPEAKER_03This guy's been like this since I was born.
SPEAKER_05He had no body parts. It was just me. I don't know about that. He didn't. You didn't read you didn't see the video? Of what? Of the beautiful people, actually, I think. Was that beautiful people?
SPEAKER_02He was doing like a spider crawl weirdness. Man, it was all like the 90s jitter cam trash where it's just like, well, I'm gonna have a seizure now. Thank you. And there was no genitals. Oh no, no, that was a dope show.
SPEAKER_03That was a whole uh separate record. Check this out. Marilyn Manson reminds me of like as Edward Scissors Hands. Is it right? Edward Scissor Hands? Yeah. Yeah, you got it. It's like long lost brother.
SPEAKER_02I think that's a service to Edward Scissor Hands. Right. It is. So wait, he got it himself canceled from Lord. Streets of Detroit. Yeah. Malnourished life.
SPEAKER_01Cancelled just cancel culture, just canceled him.
SPEAKER_05He had a complaint, a couple complaints against him. Abuse allegations. Right.
SPEAKER_01Abuse allegations. I'm not surprised, not even a little. Like is this is this news?
SPEAKER_05Not really.
SPEAKER_02It was a big last week because then it was just like, you know, people going to talk to Trent Reznor for some reason. Trent's like, no.
SPEAKER_05What the fuck?
SPEAKER_02Yeah, it's like, you remember when I called him a piece of shit 25 years ago? Yeah. So do we need to go over this again? I said that. Remember? I'm gonna go back to scoring kids' movies because I'm Trent fucking Reznor. No, for real. That dude is amazing. Oh, that's awesome. That dude is he is amazing. He did the music for what? Like it was a kid was a kid's, it was an anime like Pixar movie.
SPEAKER_05He did the Quake soundtrack from back in the day.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, back back when he was like only industrial.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, he did a few movies.
SPEAKER_02There's a recent one that was like it was a it was a kid's movie, wasn't it? Damn it. I gotta look it up. I look it up.com. We are hey, they don't pay us. I kinda I kind of feel like I need to watch the Cruella trailer just because I really enjoy Emma Stone.
SPEAKER_05I need to watch that's another one that it that I would disappoint me.
SPEAKER_02I think she'd be a lot of fun to just like have a beer with and then like and then feel like apologize profusely after disappointing her.
SPEAKER_01I am so sorry. So cool. I agree. I think she's super cool.
SPEAKER_02And hot.
SPEAKER_05I'd have a hot doesn't matter. I'd have a bit of a shot. And the real thing is, is she's one of those hots that you're sitting there watching a movie thinking, I bet no other guy thinks she's hot, but every other guy thinks she's hot.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, I don't think that's I don't think that at all. I think that every guy's like, yes, please.
SPEAKER_06Pussy, please.
SPEAKER_00Oh gosh.
SPEAKER_02Animal Kingdom. The recent Matt the recent watchmen. Matt's okay, the documentaries. I don't know what half of the shit is. All right. Just one. Just eat a dick. Just just well, yeah, just the one I'm doing. I'm not giving you the whole bag. I gotta save some for later. Oh darn. Man, eat one of my balls.
SPEAKER_03Just like McDonald's when they they don't they they ask for a large fry, but the amount they give you is just a medium in a large box.
SPEAKER_01I saw a video last week that was that that put a small fry in each one of the boxes, and it each equaled a small. That's what it it showed me. See, man. It's called robbery.
SPEAKER_03See? There's a reason why on coming to America they had McDowells. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01So anyway.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, anyway. Anyway, yes. Have you seen the pictures of people like somebody who has like the the the the the ultimate Millennium Falcon or Star Destroyer or one of those huge Lego sets? They have several of them on this shelf, and the shelf collapses. You ever seen that mess? No, I don't want to. It is demoralizing.
SPEAKER_01Right.
SPEAKER_02Like you're like, no. I would I I don't even know what I would do at that point. Hey, buddy, you need a little bit more.
SPEAKER_01So I'm looking through some looking through pictures. My beautiful, my beautiful child.
Concert Drinking Math And Sneaking Booze
SPEAKER_02Well, I guess I guess uh come and gone could be could be tears and gone. It's got multiple purposes. Oh yeah. Yeah. Porpoises.
SPEAKER_01And then I stop on this picture, and this is the one that I miss the most. Not my kid being lucky.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, yeah, not not not a little kid, just your little kid. Just the alcohol. Is that your kid behind the alcohol?
SPEAKER_01No, this was a girl's night when we when we went to see the Timba Lake.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, it got shit housed, and then it was like, look at my teenage.
SPEAKER_01Unfortunately, I did not get shit housed because the arena alcohol.
SPEAKER_02Oh, were you the semi-sober cab?
SPEAKER_01No, maybe. But the the I can't remember. You can't drink at the arena like to get drunk because they don't give you enough alcohol and they charge you like 12 bucks a drink.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, fuck them.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, that's what you pre-game. Fuck them. Pre-game like crazy.
SPEAKER_01I tried to pre-grain. That was the pre-grained.
SPEAKER_02That's out at a table. You're still paying like probably seven, eight bucks for that. Right. You sit at home and do shots.
SPEAKER_03Look, guys. Look. Anyways. Coming from the African American culture, you always got that grandmother or Big Mama. That has that big purse. That's gonna have to be a big thing.
SPEAKER_01It doesn't work at the arena. It doesn't work.
SPEAKER_03No, it doesn't matter. They got secret compartments in that thing and everything. I'm telling you.
SPEAKER_02When it's that big, you can have a you can have a hidden pocket. Yes. Yes. Why don't the bottom of this feel like alcohol, man? That's the way the purse was designed. Well, really, what you do is the the hidden compartment is is like a camelback.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_02You got the straw coming up the strap.
unknownYeah.
SPEAKER_01That's plausible. I'm just gonna just gonna oh well, okay.
SPEAKER_03Oh, really?
SPEAKER_01They've got a friend, well, a friend of mine taped a whole bag of wine to her to her stomach and made herself look pregnant.
SPEAKER_03Yeah. That is genius. Yeah, you can do that. Gosh, man. But hidden hidden complaints and things. I'm always like, how come I didn't get that one first? Because you can't appear to be pregnant. That's not what Marlene said.
SPEAKER_01Oh, okay. That's not true. That's not true anymore. You can look like it's a whole thing.
SPEAKER_05Appears pregnant. It just isn't. Get the wig, shave a little bit.
SPEAKER_01Anyway. That suits your fancy. I was looking lovingly on my martinis and I just can't wait.
SPEAKER_03How many more weeks left? Twelve?
SPEAKER_05Too many.
SPEAKER_01Too many.
SPEAKER_05Too many.
SPEAKER_01I think it's like 12 to 13.
SPEAKER_05So done with this. Get it out.
SPEAKER_01He's adorable when he kicks and everything. 93 days.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_05I'm trying to find a Bluetooth receiver that's going to be able to go back and forth so we can add phone people in.
SPEAKER_02Oh, yeah, since that one's being a piece of shit. Yep. So I'm thinking about Excuse me.
SPEAKER_01I'm being a piece of shit for bringing life into this world. Is that what you're saying?
SPEAKER_02What? What do you think? Oh no, you're talking about that piece of shit. It's not all about you, Babbo. It's not all about you.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, I think way too harsh, didn't I? Took that way too far. Well, I'm just so fucking used to it, you guys. I'm so fucking used to it. Y'all are terrible to me. I'm not gonna deny. No, no, no. I'm a nice guy. He's witnessed it though. He's he he knows I get my shit kicked in all the time by you two.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, I'm uh, you know, I'm I'm I'm a nice guy. Yeah, but that's like he's dodging he's dodging it. Do we kick her shit in? Shit all the time. Oh, yeah. Does she deserve it? Not all the time.
SPEAKER_00Not all the time. I'll take it. I'll fucking take it.
SPEAKER_0550-50.
SPEAKER_02I think there might be some kind of underhanded deal. Some un I really do think there's some quid pro quo going on here. Uh-huh.
SPEAKER_01Y'all did leave us alone seemingly at lunch.
SPEAKER_02So that explains the smell of scene when you parked earlier.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, well, fuck you.
SPEAKER_02You gotta hold on to the black thing, remember? Whoa, that black thing in front of your mouth. According to sugar.
SPEAKER_03That's Mr. Sugar to you.
SPEAKER_02They call me Mr.
SPEAKER_03They call me Mr. Sugar.
SPEAKER_05That's the the the weird science quote. It's done out of love. Yeah.
SPEAKER_03Oh, that was such a good show, man. Weird science. Weird science.
SPEAKER_05By the way, you're both fired. Congratulations.
SPEAKER_01That's not even funny.
SPEAKER_02Boning on company time.
SPEAKER_01That was a good joke. We did, yeah. That was a good joke. No, no, no.
SPEAKER_03We're only two months ahead, man. You know?
SPEAKER_05Wait. Yeah. Well, a month and a half. Well, you're not out of your probationary period. Yuck. Y'all are the worst. Yuck.
SPEAKER_03Nope. We're the best. Air high five. Woo! Like in dorks.
SPEAKER_02Oh. A recipient. What? What? No, it's just heavy size bagu over here. No, who was that?
SPEAKER_01Same call I missed earlier.
SPEAKER_02No. Go take the call. Well, I'll she doesn't wanna. We can't be. She doesn't wanna.
SPEAKER_01Well, or if we're not, I'll just go. She doesn't want to talk to him. No, I do want to talk to them. It's my accountant people.
SPEAKER_05Oh. Oh, so you're doing personal and work time again.
SPEAKER_01No, I didn't answer the fucking.
SPEAKER_05So you were saying 50-50, right? Oh my fuck.
SPEAKER_01You saw me sit here and not answer the phone.
SPEAKER_03It's 40 degrees. That's funny. So over this.
SPEAKER_05Wait, wait, where's my phone? Oh, it's not here because I'm doing a podcast.
SPEAKER_01I didn't know.
SPEAKER_05That's also because you probably missed four cards. And guess what?
SPEAKER_01I've got shit.
SPEAKER_02I should have ignored it completely. Yeah. Babbo taking things personally when she's being personally made fun of.
SPEAKER_06Always. It's normally about me.
SPEAKER_05Because if I fuck with her, then it turns into you beat me up. And then when I don't, it's like, what's wrong? You should beat me up. Choke me.
SPEAKER_03Spit in my mouth.
SPEAKER_01Anybody got some leather straps and some chains and stop taking shit to the next level. Could we ever just not take it to the next level?
SPEAKER_02No. No. That's no fun because sticks and stones will break my bones with whips and chains. Excite me. You go, Rihanna. Oh, dude.
SPEAKER_01That was re-read. That was a direct re-read quote right there.
SPEAKER_02Oh, she stole that shit. That fucking unoriginal bitch.
SPEAKER_01Did she start? Wait a minute. She stole it from y'all's night together, is what you're saying?
SPEAKER_02No, not from me. From the schoolyard in like 1997. Oh shit. I wasn't in the schoolyard. I was in high school in that. What was gonna say?
SPEAKER_06What's in Chase?
SPEAKER_02No, she's not that old. She's not no, no, Rihanna's younger than me.
SPEAKER_01That's a lyric, though. That's a fucking lyric.
SPEAKER_02Cool. It's not original. Because that is a that is a that is a schoolyard chime from you know, probably the shit, probably the Donna time.
SPEAKER_01I just don't remember. I've never heard that version until her son.
SPEAKER_02That's because you grew up in Bible country. Well, if anybody's gonna be into whips and chains, it would be the Catholic all through my life. Yeah, that explains a ton. We never did it, we never did ex f you actually. We need that explanation, man. I'm waiting on you. All right. So are you are you gonna play the part of a young attractive female? I can't.
SPEAKER_06Wow. Thanks, Dick.
SPEAKER_05You're welcome. Yeah, so it's me that shits on her all the time, right?
SPEAKER_01Well, I did just yell at him when he was talking about the fucking machine. I thought he was talking about it.
SPEAKER_02He was talking to me. Who's a piece of shit now? Anyway. Okay, so you're fired, and you're fired. So Ms. Sugar. So let's so let's say that's just you. It's not all.
SPEAKER_03So let's say my Ms. Sugar hand.
SPEAKER_06Let's uh I got you.
SPEAKER_02Oh Wanda. Uh so Wanda. Can you do can you do the can you do the the ugly Wanda face for me? Because it just yeah. Uh you're trying, but just I can't do it. Yeah, now you're just trying to when you're pucking up your lips next to that big black thick head of a fuzzy uh appendage, it really just That smells of pickle. It awakens something. No, that went away, thank you. You're welcome. You gotta put all your chain on it.
SPEAKER_03I used the Cumsie sponge, it's all good.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, get on that.
SPEAKER_03Get on that chin on it, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
SPEAKER_01Please explain. Please explain so we can cut this.
SPEAKER_05Shut up. Everybody just stopped. It went.
OnlyFans Explained For The Uninitiated
SPEAKER_02So Wanda. You have your yeah. Fucking hell. So bud. So you've you've uh been laid off of your job because Rona, your company closed or whatever. You gotta pay the rent. You can't find another job because it's fucking Rona. You got some titties, you got an ass. It goes definitely. You probably got a lot of nudes that you haven't sent anybody because you're like, how do we look in that mirror? Look in the mirror. Oh, that mirror is so dirty. You're dirty. So anyway, fast forward to like several hundred unreleased nudes.
SPEAKER_01Several hundred, Jesus Christ.
SPEAKER_02Your phone, right? People are hoes, man. Come on.
SPEAKER_01Anyway, I've had maybe 20 at a time. Just saying.
SPEAKER_02Cool. I'm listening.
SPEAKER_01I'm listening.
SPEAKER_02So so you're like, you know what? That's just money. Money being wasted. I can go, I can start up an OnlyFans, work from home, you know. People are gonna simp on me. You know what a simping is? That's when you so like an in a a patron, somebody who who subscribes to your OnlyFans thinks he has a chance. The kind of person that thinks that that a stripper likes him. Oh yeah, that guy. Yeah, that guy. Yeah. He's like, yeah, dude, she's really into me. Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Yeah, how much she spend on that? 700. Yeah, she's India, buddy. Right. Really India. Right. She call you back? No? So OnlyFans is is basically a way for internet connected hoes to reach their simp. You don't have to do live live streams. You pre-record and edit everything so that you can you can you know do the Instagram reality thing where like like that little bit of of extra pudge or something somewhere you can edit that out so you look super fake, like uh like a like one of those fuck dolls. Oh, fast he ran through that too. Fuck dolls? Fuck dolls.
SPEAKER_01Fuck dolls?
SPEAKER_02Emphasis on F.
SPEAKER_01Well, because you know and then you upload doll.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, so then you upload your all your images and videos. And then you charge. Yeah, people pay you twenty bucks a month to look at your news. That's it. I mean, you can charge more if you're more attractive. Well, no, no. Well, you uh the the base the base will probably always start around twenty. Okay.
SPEAKER_05But that's the most there are different tiers, huh? Did you just say we start around twenty? No. Okay. Just checking. Misheard. 1999 sounds better.
SPEAKER_03It does.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, the penny off.
SPEAKER_01Yeah, 1999, you always start there. Yep. But all I'm saying, man.
SPEAKER_02Busted.
SPEAKER_01I just wish it was a thing back.
SPEAKER_02Yeah, to wish it was a thing. Like your college, you would have no college.
SPEAKER_01I wouldn't have debt.
SPEAKER_05The only asset you got your feet. So damn, they're fucked up.
SPEAKER_01God, y'all are just fucking mean. I'm actually really attracted.
SPEAKER_0513 or 14 more times, and I'm at it.
SPEAKER_02Anyway, but you know, but you but literally you just.
SPEAKER_01Isn't there different? So wait, tiers. So like you can pay to see more. Yeah. Or something like that. Because I know I know that there's a monthly, and then you can pay like for individual items, no?
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Yeah.
SPEAKER_01I mean, like you could you could have a video that like you're already subscribed, and then it's like you can't see this unless you give me another 10 bucks.
SPEAKER_02Yeah. Yeah. And then you go, bitch. That's that bitch. She's bait and switch. I'm gonna have a heart time. Step out of this one. You want me to show you wanna show me something? Let me show you something. Fuck her. I'm just gonna go ahead and get this. Oh, okay. Like two, pay me. If I didn't if I didn't, I will rate your cock.
SPEAKER_01If I didn't love Jesus, man, I'd be all over that.
SPEAKER_02Jesus loves titties, man.
SPEAKER_01I don't know about that.
SPEAKER_02Everybody loves titties. Fuck off.
SPEAKER_01But I'm just saying.
SPEAKER_02Yeah.
Chest Feeding Language Fight
SPEAKER_01Did y'all hear? I really, we really gotta go. But did y'all hear that breastfeeding is now if you say breastfeeding, it's non-inclusive, and you're supposed to say chest feeding.
SPEAKER_03Nope, I'm definitely saying boob feeding.
SPEAKER_01Tite feeding.
SPEAKER_03Just get this fucking boob.
SPEAKER_05Come on, get this boob, this boob fest. No, he did. He just had a mini stroke and y'all passed by it. He thought about boobs and went boob. He fucking barfed the most. He went to go say boobs and he didn't say boobs. He just went boob.
SPEAKER_01Listen, boobs are great. Everybody loves boobs.
SPEAKER_03They have a stroke when somebody mentions them. I got excited. I'm sorry. Clearly, just boobs. Even women love boobs.
SPEAKER_01I love boobs. But I'm just saying, isn't that a little 50% of the goddamn thing I looked at you, but I feel like you and I'm like, okay.
SPEAKER_06Shit like this. They're fucking awesome. Yes. Yeah. They're fucking fun. Okay.
SPEAKER_05Please express to me at some point when breasts have been fun to you.
SPEAKER_01During my threesome?
SPEAKER_02There you go. Whoa. There it is. Doodale. No, he's taking notes. I think go.
SPEAKER_06During all the women I've made outlets. It's recorded. And I'm too sober for this shit.
SPEAKER_03Oh man, anybody got offered to be an asshole for nothing friendly.
SPEAKER_02Every drink, the eyes go farther apart.
SPEAKER_01You really prevent me from getting that daggery all the way home.
SPEAKER_05Well, I sh yeah.
SPEAKER_01Anyway. But I'm doing a civic service.
SPEAKER_05We're doing the right thing.
SPEAKER_01At least, I mean, I've made out with at least five chicks, I think. So I mean, yeah, boobs are fucking fun. My point was, isn't this shit ridiculous that we have to supposedly call it chest feeding now, or we're non-inclusive?
SPEAKER_02Can we call them chesticles? Is this a is this according to this is this is I don't know.
SPEAKER_01Where are you reading? The internet.
SPEAKER_02Okay, but where on the internet? Because as they as the wise and sage Abraham Lincoln once said, don't believe everything you read on the internet.
SPEAKER_06I don't think he said that.
SPEAKER_02Well shit, I read it on the internet.
SPEAKER_05That is a blurb. Yeah.
SPEAKER_02That is that is a blurb. That is a blurb.
SPEAKER_01Some it's a sum. I don't know who some is.
SPEAKER_02I'm looking at a picture of the man's head.
SPEAKER_01Some move to change breast milk to chest or human milk in an effort to be more inclusive.
SPEAKER_05That word, did y'all catch that? That that that uh objectifier the the word, because there's a word there that threw that whole thing off. Says some that exactly. That's how it starts. Some so you got two people in a room that are fucking high as shit, and they're like, I don't want to call them breasts anymore.
SPEAKER_01Were midwives encouraged to say chest feeding? A maternity department to at a UK hospital announced in February. It feels an unnatural.
SPEAKER_05Yeah, man. It's just really ruined. Men can't fucking breastfeed.
SPEAKER_01I'm sorry. It's not chest feeding.
SPEAKER_05You could try. I mean, it's more like a power.
SPEAKER_01I'm just saying, like, if I'm the mom for some discharge, you can try to latch onto your tit as a bow because that's not gonna happen. It's uncomfortable. Don't do it.
SPEAKER_02Be around like a kid who, like an infant who was who wants who wants to latch onto something. It wasn't intentional, fucking kids. Kids are like that.
SPEAKER_05Well, since we're gonna go ahead and circle the drain with it, I'm gonna be the one that says it. He already said if you got the big black thing in front of you.
SPEAKER_02I'm not putting a dick there.
SPEAKER_05Let alone a black because you went the wrong way with that, but good for you.
SPEAKER_01Pregnant people and chest feeding. That's what they're encouraging them to say. Pregnant people, so it's not pregnant women.
SPEAKER_02The dude isn't pregnant. He did the fucking thing. He dropped it. I know the package, dropped it off, and fucking got back in the truck and went home. He's like, Do you piss one?
SPEAKER_05I'm gonna give a Bobo line.
SPEAKER_03I'm just just knocking on the door and run, huh? No, it's a Bobo line. He came in, he came in the doorway at least.
SPEAKER_05I'm done. Fuck this shit. I'm done. Fuck this shit. I'm quitting my job. I'm done.
SPEAKER_01I'm done. If we could have kept on with the threesome, that would have been one. Yeah, he was interested.
SPEAKER_02We already know I can't draw a dick. A dick. He tried really hard.
SPEAKER_01No. But never mind. I'm not a drawer.
SPEAKER_03Do you need lessons from my daughter?
SPEAKER_05On how to draw a dick? I was gonna say that's that was a parallel one. So I went two places with that and neither of them good. Okay.
SPEAKER_03She's notorious for drawing dick dick tits. Tits are great.
SPEAKER_01It's called breastfeeding. That's the end of my soapbox.
SPEAKER_02Well, that's not even a soapbox. I think the some people is like four or four people. Who are they trying to include in this? Do you know what you did, Bobby?
SPEAKER_01Trans people.
SPEAKER_05You know what you did, Bobby?
SPEAKER_01What did I do?
SPEAKER_05You just did to a small portion of our constituents listening. You just edged them. And that makes you a fucked art.
SPEAKER_02Wait, edging? Do you know what edging is? Whatever it is, it's not what you just said. Okay. Enlighten me. Edging is when you is when somebody provides manual or oral or whatever simulation to the phallus, a dick. Right. To the point nearing climax.
Threesome Story Edging And Wrap Up
SPEAKER_01And then give some blue balls.
SPEAKER_02No. You just keep it going. Edging is you keep going. You keep going, you keep going. You're almost there, and then you're like, well, roll back. Don't fucking don't fucking bust out.
SPEAKER_05She started talking about her her fucking girl on girl action and then let it go.
SPEAKER_02Started in again. Okay, so let it go. The context of what where that connection was in your head didn't match anywhere else because you skipped over what's going on. It's called editing magic, fucker. Well, we're gonna have to edit.
SPEAKER_01It's gonna be a lot of editing regardless.
SPEAKER_05Oh, well, that's fucking sad. This is blurbed tastic. What's the breastfeeding? No, the breastfeeding might stay.
SPEAKER_03We'll probably gotta come to that. No, no, no.
SPEAKER_05You can't say that. Chest feeding.
SPEAKER_01Fuck that. Anyway.
SPEAKER_03Doom doom doom.
SPEAKER_01It's not plural.
SPEAKER_05You said you've been with multiple women. I said. She's been out with five. So she wrote really into that Katy Perry song.
SPEAKER_02She's counting. She kissed a girl and she liked it. Please insert here.
SPEAKER_01Damn. Am I not? Don't forget Khili. So it's a scissor. There's no way it's only. We tried.
SPEAKER_03Alright, there's a word for that. There's a word for that.
SPEAKER_05We were fucking serious. You need to shut the fuck up. Okay.
SPEAKER_02She's busy here. Okay, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. We're talking labia to labia action. Oh man, I go. Yeah, it was like a couple.
SPEAKER_01I don't really from what I remember. I mean, there was a lot of vodka involved. That's all it takes? A lot. Yeah, I don't I don't drink vodka very often. Um maybe not. Anyway, I don't remember that being one of the things that felt good. No. I don't think it works. I personally don't think it works. So what did? I'm gonna be as red as this fucking microphone cord before it's over.
SPEAKER_02Who started this? You're red as a dog's dick.
SPEAKER_04Oh, that's fucking bad. No, that's not Raspberry. We're not gonna get back. That's like a pig ring. We're not gonna get back into fucking Chad's cosmetic line. Hey, why not, dude?
SPEAKER_05Because I think you put that on the floor ages ago. I think yeah, Chad's cosmetic line went to my. It's a lip gloss.
SPEAKER_01Would have been great for the summer. Exactly.
SPEAKER_02It's just it's a lively movie. Okay, well, it's a vibrant day. Okay, so we just the same shit that works for everybody.
SPEAKER_05Tongues, digits, and dicks. Talk to me like I'm a retard. Fucking hell.
SPEAKER_06Tongues and dicks. I'm fucking done. Are you okay?
